
Uncover Tenerife's Hidden Gem: La Casona del Patio Awaits!
Uncover Tenerife's Hidden Gem: La Casona del Patio Awaits! - A Review (and a Plea to Just Book It Already!)
Okay, alright, let's talk about La Casona del Patio in Tenerife. Forget those sterile, corporate hotel reviews. This is real talk. I'm talking from the heart, from the depths of my travel-worn soul, after spending a week there. And honestly? I'm still dreaming of the damn place.
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First Impressions: The Accessibility Tango (and Why It Matters)
Look, I'm not in a wheelchair, but I've traveled with people who are. And accessibility, or the lack of it, can make or break a vacation. I’m happy to report, La Casona understands this. Wheelchair accessible is a big, fat YES, which is a huge win. I saw ramps, elevators, and wide doorways – all the things that make life easier, and more inclusive. They also have Facilities for disabled guests, which is a great touch.
Internet - Because We're All Addicted
Let's be real, we're all glued to our phones. La Casona gets this. Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! Yep, that's right. You can Instagram your poolside cocktails (more on those later) to your heart's content. They also have Internet access – LAN if you're old-school, and Wi-Fi in public areas. I mean, they've covered their bases. No dropped calls, no buffering videos. Bliss.
Getting Around: Parking and Airport Shenanigans
Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], and they even have a Car power charging station. (Tesla owners, rejoice!) Airport transfer is also an option. Honestly, after a long flight, the thought of someone else driving you to paradise is pure gold. They also have Taxi service, Valet parking, and Bicycle parking. Basically, however you want to get there, they've thought of it.
Rooms: Your Personal Oasis (with a View, Probably)
Okay, the rooms. Forget cookie-cutter hotel rooms. These are…well, they're special. They have Air conditioning, obviously. Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.
My room? Glorious. Huge, with a balcony overlooking… wait for it… the pool (more on that later). The blackout curtains were a lifesaver for those lazy mornings. And the slippers? Pure, fluffy heaven. The mini bar was a dangerous temptation. Let's just say I may have sampled a few local wines. And the Internet access – wireless was a godsend for working (or, you know, pretending to).
Cleanliness and Safety: Because We're Living in the Apocalypse (Kinda)
Let's be honest, 2024 has been a trip. La Casona takes safety seriously. Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment. They've got it all. There's even Room sanitization opt-out available if you want to skip the cleaning. It's a relief to see this level of commitment.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: Prepare to Unbutton Your Pants
This is where La Casona really shines. The food? Oh. My. God. I'm not even kidding.
- Restaurants: They have them, plural. Multiple.
- A la carte in restaurant: Yes, please!
- Asian cuisine in restaurant: Spicy, flavorful, divine.
- Bar: Essential.
- Breakfast [buffet]: The holy grail. Seriously, the buffet was a work of art. Fresh pastries, local cheeses, fruit that tasted like sunshine, and eggs cooked to perfection. I may have eaten three plates.
- Breakfast service: You betcha.
- Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop: Fueling your day.
- Desserts in restaurant: I almost cried when I saw the dessert menu.
- International cuisine in restaurant: A global culinary tour.
- Poolside bar: Cocktails, sunshine, and a view? Yes, please.
- Room service [24-hour]: For those late-night cravings (or, you know, when you just can't bear to leave your room).
- Snack bar: For those in-between meal cravings.
- Vegetarian restaurant: Plenty of options.
- Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant: If you're not feeling adventurous, they have you covered.
- Bottle of water: Always appreciated.
- Alternative meal arrangement Yes, they accommodate dietary needs.
The Pool (and Other Ways to Relax): My Happy Place
The Swimming pool [outdoor] is stunning. And that Pool with view? Seriously, it's Instagram-worthy. I spent hours just floating, staring at the views, and sipping cocktails from the poolside bar. Pure bliss.
They also have a Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Sauna, Massage, Foot bath, Body scrub, and Body wrap. I had a massage. Honestly? It was the best massage of my life. I walked out feeling like a new person. They also have a Fitness center if you feel like working off all the food. I did not.
Services and Conveniences: They Thought of Everything
- Air conditioning in public area: Because Tenerife gets hot.
- Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Safety deposit boxes, Terrace, Xerox/fax in business center: The list goes on and on. They literally have everything you could possibly need.
- Contactless check-in/out: Easy peasy.
- Convenience store: For those last-minute essentials.
- Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal: Families are totally welcome.
- Hotel chain: A reliable brand.
- Front desk [24-hour], Security [24-hour], CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property: You feel secure.
- Couple's room, Non-smoking rooms, Proposal spot, Room decorations, Smoke alarms, Soundproof rooms: Romantic vibes.
- Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Seminars: Business and pleasure.
- Shrine: If you're into that.
- Audio-visual equipment for special events, Projector/LED display, Wi-Fi for special events: For your events.
- Essential condiments: The little things matter.
- Additional toilet, Additional toilet, Additional toilet: Never a bad thing.
Now, for the Real Talk: My La Casona Anecdotes (and Imperfections)
Okay, so here's the honest truth. My first day? I got lost trying to find the pool. Seriously. I wandered around for a good ten minutes, muttering to myself. But then I found it. And the view? Worth every wrong turn.
And the food? I mentioned the buffet, right? One morning, I was so busy enjoying the view from the balcony that I almost missed breakfast. I sprinted down, grabbed a plate, and piled it high with everything. I'm talking pastries, fruit, eggs, bacon…the works. And then, as I was about to dig in, I realized I'd forgotten my coffee. The horror! I ran back, grabbed a cup, and returned to my breakfast. It was a perfect moment.
One slight imperfection? The Wi-Fi in my room cut out once, but it was quickly fixed. And the service? Impeccable. The staff were friendly, helpful, and always went the extra mile. They made me feel like royalty.
The Verdict: Book It. Seriously, Just Book It.
La Casona del Patio isn't just a hotel
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Okay, buckle up, buttercups! You're about to get the real La Casona del Patio, Tenerife, itinerary. Forget the perfectly curated Instagram feed; this is the messy, glorious truth. Prepare for a rollercoaster.
La Casona del Patio: A Hot Mess of Sun, Sand, and Slightly Overpriced Tapas (Probably)
Day 1: Arrival and the Great Balcony Panic of '24
- Morning (ish): Landed at Tenerife South. The flight was a blur of crying babies, aggressively elbowing seatmates, and that weird, existential dread that always hits on planes. The weather? Glorious. Immediately regretted not packing more sunscreen.
- Afternoon: Taxi to La Casona. The building is beautiful, no lie. That courtyard? Chef's kiss. But… the room? Smaller than advertised. Like, could-touch-both-walls-at-the-same-time small. Initial panic set in. "Where am I going to put my stuff?!" (My stuff being three t-shirts, a book, and a shameful amount of emergency chocolate).
- Late Afternoon/Early Evening: The Great Balcony Panic. Our room, apparently, has a balcony. But it’s locked. And the key? Missing. Spent a good hour flailing around, trying to subtly signal for help from the courtyard below. Eventually, a very patient (and probably judging) hotel staff member arrived. Turns out, the key was just… stuck. Crisis averted. Sat on the balcony, sipped a lukewarm beer (I forgot to get ice), and watched the sun set. Glorious, even with the lukewarm beer.
- Evening: Wandered into the town of La Orotava. Found a tapas place that looked charming, but the server was clearly having a bad day. Got the wrong order, the patatas bravas were lukewarm, and my attempts at Spanish resulted in a lot of blank stares. Decided to drown my sorrows in more local beer. Ended up chatting with a local about the best beaches. He recommended Playa de las Teresitas. Said it was a "must-see." I'm skeptical, but intrigued.
Day 2: Beach Bliss (and the Great Sunburn of '24)
- Morning: Playa de las Teresitas! Okay, the local was right. Absolutely stunning. The sand is imported Saharan sand, which is just wild. Spent hours baking myself like a croissant. Forgot to reapply sunscreen. Big mistake. Huge.
- Afternoon: The Great Sunburn of '24. Found myself resembling a lobster. Hobbled back to the hotel, cursing my pale Irish skin. Spent the rest of the afternoon slathered in aloe vera, weeping softly.
- Late Afternoon: Despite the pain, I ventured out to a recommended restaurant. The food was actually pretty good. Managed to eat a whole plate of grilled octopus. The sunstroke was making me feel adventurous.
- Evening: Sat on the balcony (again), watching the stars. The air was warm, the pain was subsiding, and I was starting to feel a little bit more… okay.
Day 3: Mount Teide and the Altitude Angst
- Morning: Decided to be a responsible tourist and booked a day trip to Mount Teide, Spain's highest peak. The drive up was… intense. The views were breathtaking, but I'm not gonna lie, the altitude made me feel a little queasy.
- Afternoon: The cable car ride up was terrifying. The views were spectacular, but my ears popped, and I was convinced I was going to pass out. Reached the top, took some pictures, and promptly retreated to the gift shop to buy a ridiculously overpriced Teide-themed snow globe.
- Late Afternoon: Found a little cafe and ordered a coffee with a view. The altitude sickness had settled, but my stomach was still doing flips. Started to feel better.
- Evening: Back in La Orotava. Had a delicious dinner at a restaurant. Talked to a local. Learned a lot about Tenerife. Feeling a lot more connected.
Day 4: Exploring the North Coast and the Great Lost Bus Ticket Incident
- Morning: Attempted to take a bus to Garachico, a beautiful town on the north coast. Got on the wrong bus. Realized my mistake halfway through the journey. The driver just sighed and told me to get off.
- Afternoon: Finally made it to Garachico. Wandered around the natural rock pools, which were amazing. The waves crashing against the black volcanic rocks were mesmerizing. Forgot all about the lost bus ticket.
- Late Afternoon: Found a small bar overlooking the ocean. Ordered some local wine and watched the sunset. Perfect.
- Evening: Back at the hotel. Packed my bags, ready to leave.
Day 5: Departure and the Great "I'll Be Back" Feeling
- Morning: Last breakfast on the terrace. The coffee was perfect. I found myself sad to go.
- Departure: Taxi to the airport. The flight was uneventful (thank goodness).
- Afternoon: Back home. Already planning my return to Tenerife.
Quirky Observations and Emotional Reactions:
- The sheer number of cats roaming freely is both charming and slightly unsettling.
- The locals are friendly, even when you butcher their language.
- The sunsets are genuinely soul-stirring.
- I definitely overpacked.
- I under-sunscreened.
- The food is hit-or-miss, but the local wine? Always a winner.
- I fell in love with Tenerife. It's a beautiful, messy, imperfect place, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
Messy Structure and Occasional Rambles:
Okay, so maybe this wasn't the most efficient itinerary. I got lost, I got sunburned, I had a minor existential crisis on a cable car. But that's the point, right? This isn't a perfectly polished travelogue; it's a snapshot of a real experience. I'm not going to pretend I had it all figured out. I didn't. But I loved every chaotic, sun-drenched moment.
Stronger Emotional Reactions:
- Frustration: The locked balcony, the lost bus ticket, the lukewarm patatas bravas… moments of pure, unadulterated frustration.
- Joy: The sunsets, the beaches, the moments of connection with the locals… moments of pure, unadulterated joy.
- Awe: The views from Mount Teide, the beauty of the natural rock pools… moments of pure awe.
- Love: The feeling I had when I left.
Opinionated Language and Natural Pacing:
Look, you have to go to Playa de las Teresitas. It's a must-see. And if you go to Mount Teide, prepare for the altitude. It's a killer. And for the love of all that is holy, wear sunscreen! You’ll thank me later.
This is a good start. I'll let you make it your own and continue to edit.
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Uncover Tenerife's Hidden Gem: La Casona del Patio Awaits! - FAQs (and a whole lot more!)
What's all the fuss about La Casona del Patio, anyway? Is it *really* a "hidden gem"?
Okay, so here's the deal: "Hidden gem" is thrown around a LOT, right? But with La Casona del Patio... yeah, it actually *is*. I stumbled upon it by accident, honestly. Google Maps led me astray (as it often does), and I ended up practically on their doorstep. I was expecting some bland, tourist-trap hotel, you know? The kind where everything looks perfect in the brochure and then... *blech*.
But walking through the courtyard… whoa. Seriously. It's like stepping back in time, but with modern comforts. I remember thinking, "Okay, this is different." The walls are thick, the air is cool (a godsend in Tenerife!), and there's this incredible sense of peace. It's not just a place to sleep; it's an experience. A damn good one, at that.
**My honest opinion?** Yes, it's a hidden gem. Prepare to be charmed. Just be warned: you might not want to leave. I almost didn't.
Is it expensive? Because "hidden gem" often translates to "bank account destroyer."
Alright, let's talk money. I'm not exactly rolling in it, so believe me, I appreciate a good deal. La Casona del Patio is… not dirt cheap. But it's also not extortionate. I'd say it's *very* reasonable for what you get. Think of it as an investment in your sanity, your happiness, and a truly unique experience.
I remember checking the prices and thinking, "Okay, I can justify this." And honestly? After staying there, I would have happily paid *more*. The value is definitely there. Consider it a splurge, not a splurge that leaves you eating ramen for a month. (Unless you're *really* into ramen, then more power to you!)
What's the location like? Is it near anything interesting, or am I going to be stuck in the middle of nowhere?
Location, location, location! La Casona del Patio is in a charming, traditional Canarian town. It's not right on the beach, which I actually *loved*. You get a sense of real Tenerife, not the tourist-saturated areas.
You're close enough to explore some amazing hiking trails, the local markets are fantastic (bring your appetite!), and the food… oh, the food! I had the best tapas of my life in a tiny little bar just a few minutes' walk away. Seriously, I still dream about it.
**Here's a little tip:** Rent a car! It'll give you the freedom to explore the island at your own pace. Public transport is okay, but a car opens up so many possibilities. Trust me on this one.
Okay, the food. Tell me more about the food. This is important.
FOOD. YES. Okay, so the Casona itself has a breakfast, and it was delicious. Fresh fruit, local bread, the works. But the *real* magic is in the surrounding area.
I remember this little restaurant, *El Rinconcito de la Abuela* (not the real name, but close enough!) It was tiny, run by this sweet old lady who barely spoke English, but the food… the food was divine. The papas arrugadas (wrinkled potatoes) were perfect, the mojo sauce was spicy and addictive, and the grilled fish… Ugh. I'm getting hungry just thinking about it.
**Rambling alert:** Seriously, I went back there three times! I felt like I was part of the family. The atmosphere was warm and inviting, the food was authentic, and the price was ridiculously cheap. It was a total food-lover's paradise. If you go, you *have* to try the local wine. Trust me. You'll thank me later. Just... pace yourself.
What about the rooms? Are they nice? Are they clean? (Because let's be honest, that's a big deal.)
The rooms? Oh, the rooms! They were fantastic. They're not just "clean," they're *spotless*. And they have character! Think exposed wooden beams, stone walls, and comfortable beds. It's not a sterile, generic hotel room. It's a cozy, inviting space.
I remember the first time I walked in, I just sighed with relief. It felt like a sanctuary. And the bathrooms? Modern, well-equipped, and clean as a whistle. I’m a bit of a germaphobe (don’t judge!), and I had absolutely zero complaints.
**Here's a minor, but important, imperfection:** The Wi-Fi wasn't the fastest. But honestly? I didn't care. I was there to disconnect, not to binge-watch Netflix. (Though, if you *need* to stream, maybe bring a mobile hotspot.)
Any downsides? Anything I should be aware of *before* I book?
Okay, let's be real. No place is perfect. And I'm not one to sugarcoat things.
**The biggest "downside" (and it's not really a downside, just a heads-up):** It's not a party hotel. If you're looking for loud music and all-night revelry, this isn't the place for you. It's quiet. Peaceful. Relaxing. Which, for me, was a *huge* plus.
**Other things to consider:** The parking can be a bit tricky. Sometimes, you might have to park a few streets away. But it's manageable. And the reception isn't open 24/7, so plan your arrival accordingly. But honestly, these are minor inconveniences.
**My biggest regret?** Not staying longer. I wish I had booked a week instead of just a few days. I was genuinely sad to leave.
Okay, you've convinced me. What's the *vibe*? What's the overall experience like?
The vibe? Imagine this: You're sitting in a sun-drenched courtyard, sipping a glass of local wine, listening to the gentle murmur of conversation, and feeling… content. Utterly and completely content.
It's a place where you can truly *relax*. Where you can disconnect from the stresses of everyday lifeHotel Radar Map

